Pain pain go away

The thing with crohns is I look perfectly normal on the outside. I can smile like I’m happy, walk normally and talk like it’s going out of fashion. It’s a facade, a very good front.

It’s easy for people to forget that I have an incurable disease or for those that don’t know me to think I’m full of bull.

Now I’m not saying I want to be treated like I’m unwell but just that it to be recognised that when I say I’m hurting, I’m believed . Or when you are too tired to do your normal day to day activities  or go out with friends, not to be met with, “oh excuses” or “Well you look fine”

If a person with IBD was turned inside out, it would show just how poorly we are.

At present I’m going through a stage where my joints are absolutely killing me, the ones in my fingers are especially bad. Now at 32 I really don’t feel that this should be happening, but unfortunately it is, so I put on my big girl pants and deal as best I can.

As with anything, that facade cracks now and then, especially on days where I haven’t slept and everything hurts. My stomach feels like someone is inside twisting it into knots, my joints make me me feel like I’m 90 and I’m pooping through the eye of a needle.  Not to mention the fatigue…. Now that’s another story.

Not to sound like a broken record but it can feel like you can’t catch a break from it. It’s like a sensory bombardment of hurt that won’t leave you alone. This can make me grumpy or emotional and sometimes even irrational.

The point I want to make is people shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, and yes this works both ways.

Everyone is fighting their own battle and a little bit of compassion can go a long way.

Love to all and keep fighting, we are not alone no matter sometimes how it may feel like it. Xxx

Pain, pain go away come again another day.

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